Humor in Real Life

The past couple of years have provided us all with plenty of reasons to feel discouraged, dispirited, or even downright depressed. Much death and suffering has come as a result of the COVID pandemic, and much disruption and personal devastation has come as a result of the things government has done in an effort to fight the pandemic. I hadn’t seen any statistics on business closures, so I did a quick search. The Wall Street Journal reported an “extra” 200,000 business closures in the pandemic’s first year. That’s a lot of dreams gone up in smoke.

In these days, it seems that humor, tragedy, and parody become muddled into a confusion of reactions to the news and commentary we see. One of my favorite examples came when I saw a news report about a school opening up to students last year. The report showed, among other things, students participating in their band class. Two flute players were shown wearing masks, but with two inch by four inch sections cut out of the masks so they could play their instruments. Two things about that: 1. It is clearly absurd. 2. The reporter didn’t seem to notice the absurdity.

Another example, which isn’t funny, is the one or two or ten thousand times people who issued mask or “stay at home” edicts have been caught on film not staying at home or wearing masks. As I say, not funny, but emblematic of how things are.

This is kind of funny. As reported by journalist Jeffery Anderson, and reprinted in the Washington Examiner, a 2020 study in Denmark with 4,800 participants found that “1.8 percent of those in the mask group and 2.1 percent of those in the control group became infected with Covid-19 within a month, with this 0.3-point difference not being statistically significant.” And yet, we wear them.

That being said, I find it amusing to see a person, driving alone in their car, wearing a mask. In my opinion, if they want to do that, they should. And, who knows? It seems there is more that we don’t know than that we do know.

Another darkly funny article shared that euthanasia clinics in Germany require people wishing to commit assisted suicide to be vaccinated. I was glad to read that it wasn’t for the clinic customer’s protection, but for the staff’s safety. So, once the initial reaction passed, I guess it does make sense.

It will be interesting to read what history has to say about this time in our lives, once the dust and aerosol virus particles have settled. I’m open to the idea that there are some dark conspiracies at play, as many believe, but I’m also open to the likelihood that what we’re experiencing with all the rules and public pronouncements is the result of a lot of people of good will doing their best to deal with a difficult problem.

What are you smiling at?

What Happened Today?

It’s 5:27 in the afternoon on a Wednesday. I haven’t heard or seen any news since around noon. It’s nice, really, not knowing what has gone on in the world, our country, my state, or even my neighborhood. There has been plenty of craziness to go around lately, and to think it has magically stopped while I was working is just silly.

I think I’ll just make up some news that might have happened, and if I have the courage to open my eyes later this evening I can see if I was right about any of it.

(WARNING: The following is meant to be amusing. If you have no sense of humor, please hit the “back” button.)

1. Since most masks aren’t very effective in filtering tiny virus particles, citizens are being asked to wear two masks at a time.
2. Temperatures in the 90s have turned some paper masks back into paper pulp. A solution is being sought.
3. A commission has been set up to plan a blue-ribbon panel to appoint a public-private partnership committee on how to have police protection without having police. No police will be involved in this process.
4. Milwaukee man explains for the hundredth time that saying black lives matter doesn’t suggest that other lives don’t matter. He can no longer Tweet or post that assertion on Facebook, as it is seen as “hate-speech.”
5. Noxious cloud of automobile exhaust from the thousands waiting to get drive-up Covid19 tests drifts into area nursing home vents causing the carbon monoxide poisoning of three.
6. Increasing violence and shootings across America are ignored unless police or historical figures are involved.
7. White man driving drunk is pulled over after somehow driving sideways over a fire hydrant. Says he now understands the unfairness of black men being pulled over for no reason. Black men disagree.
8. Judge decrees that anyone saying “we’re all in this together” may be slapped in the face after July 15th, since that the phrase will have run its course to the point of exhaustion by then.

There you have it. My best guesses on what I’ll see and hear once my mini-news blackout has ended. Who knows? Maybe some of my made-up news stories are close to reality. Not too close, though. At least six feet.